Newsbreak

Republican High Moral Ground - Republicans. The "moral" party. The party that, when they had their national convention, needed to fly in prostitutes because the entire New York prostitution populus would not be enough to service the politicians who traveled there. Now thats moral conviction.

Further Proof Disney is Satan - A woman in Europe was fired from playing snow white for posing nude in a magazine. From a man who thinks it is ok for cartoon, male, ducks to walk around with no pants, female mice to wear skirts so short their white, frilly underwear is always showing, thinks its improper for Snow White to show off the goods in a magazine.

Phat Burger - While McDonalds is trying to fool people into thinking their food is healthy, Hardees goes the other way. The Thick burger. 2/3 pounds of angus beef, 4 strips of bacon, 3 pieces of cheese, mayo, on a buttered sesame bun. 107 grams of fat. Over 1400 calories. I salute you Hardees.

Oooo, Hot Lava - Hot lava can kill. Even when it is in a lamp, and you cook it to boiling on the stove. Yes, the lightbulb won't get the liquid as hot as a gas stove. Thats why the glass doesn't explode and shoot into your neck. Of course the guy who did that lived in a trailer.

Scholorships - You can get a scholorship for many odd things nowadays. Speaking Klingon. Making clothing out of duct tape. I wish I would have known this ten years ago. I would have learned more of the intricate Klingon language, and practiced the art of making things out of duct tape a little more relgiously.

Politically Incorrect Website - Yes, a website where you can go and ask questions that are deemed non PC through the anonimity of the internet. Great idea, but some questions I know are impossible to answer. I wouldn't know what to tell someone if they asked me why white people smell like mustard.

Most Non Politically Correct Phrases - Speaking of PC, and that goes both ways, Politically correct and personal computer... The term Master/Slave for a two hard drive set up on a computer has been deemed the most non pol. correct phrase. Luckily my pc is pc... I do my two hard drive set up via the "cable select" set up.

Women Are Evil - It is true. Its now proven. Women are evil. They intentionally try to confuse, and get us males to slip when asking us questions. It isn't our fault... they bring it upon themselves... Yeah... thats it.

Men are Mindless - Ladies, you knew it was true, and here is evidence. Men don't think. We get home, drop our shit in the middle of the floor, and plop on the couch, hand firmly on the remote. We also don't see dust. Our brains shut down after a certain hour. It is why we are men.