Paris Got Hacked

In case some of you didn't know, Paris Hilton's cell phone got hacked. All her phone numbers and contacts are now available on the web. Kinda sad and disgusting. Of course to show my complete lack of taste and discretion, I am going to post a link to a website that has the information.

Big Fat Link To Paris Hiltons Phonebook

I had a lot of thoughts on people on there to call:

Fred Durst to tell him he has little talent, that Wes Borland was right, and he should just get a job molesting goats.

Vin Diesel just to tell him he has no acting talent, and should just stick to roles where he doesn't talk, and just plays a bad ass.

Ashlee Simpson to tell her she can't sing, or dance (what the hell is that leg flop side to side thing?), and to stop pretending, because she only got where she is because of her sister.

Lil John and just say "Yeah!!!" and hang up.

Pharrell and just tell him he is a god.

I just wish she had some celebrity numbers on there I could use, like women I lusted. None I could spot. I think all she hangs out with are waifish blonde girls, and the occasional brown haired girl. You need new friends Paris. And a new phone number. I'm sure your friends all changed theirs. Poor people.