How To Run A Successful Political Campaign

I've avoided my politicalness, besides humor, on this blog. This original post shall be no different. It's intended to be funny, because it is true. My whole point of making this point, is because I am disgusted by this years campaigns more than I have ever been disgusted by politicians. I have noticed similarities between both camps, and feel the need to point them out, on how to run a "successful" campaign.

First, you must find your biggest weakness, and claim it is why you are heads up above your opponant. If you claim it is your strength, it makes all attacks on your record meaningless, because you say its something you are good at.

Second, you must twist anything that ever comes out of your opponants mouth around, and use as little of it as possible, to attack them. Repeat this claim 8 times minimum a speech. If your opponant claims, for example, that he loves the sheep herding industry, and it needs federal support. Then you must claim your opponant loves sheep, and that he sleeps with them.

Third, pick a runningmate that is everything that you are not perceived as.

Fourth, go back as far as possible into your opponants past, and dig up whatever dirt is available. If your opponant was caught peaking in the girls lockeroom in high school, use that to label him as a pervert 40 years later. Hell, people don't change in 40 years, do they?

Fifth, re-write history for your benefit. My example on this is going to be something in this election, and in several past elections... Vietnam. For what in history books as far as I have ever read, was an unpopular war, I've heard candidates slammed for dodging, serving, serving in the National guard and not regular service, medals, service record, and opinions on the war. Give me a fucking break. THE SHIT HAPPENED 30 YEARS AGO!!! I think the guys have changed a bit in the past 30 years.

Sixth, dig up as many numbers on your record, and broadcast any positives, and claim they are indicators of how great you are.

Seventh, claim any negative number on your record as being meaningless, because you have another number, slightly related, that is a positive.

Eighth, place blame for anything on a sophisticated sounding term or the media. Notice how both sides blame the media? Here is a hint. CNN is for liberals, Fox News is for conservatives. I know people out there will claim one is and one isn't biased, and odds are, the party they affiliate with is the news that is non biased. My reply to any of that will be "my ass" and thats it.

Ninth, bring up old moral issues, dealt with years ago, that you will not be able to change, and make it an issue. I don't care if your president, the rulings on abortion aren't going to change. Its a dumb argument for a political campaign. No one goes "you got an abortion, GREAT!!! Your family must be so proud." No one likes abortion, if they are pro-life or pro-choice.

DAVE CHAPPELLE AS RICK JAMES BITCH FOR PRESIDENT!!!

Nifty T-Shirts

These are all descriptions and phrases on T-shirts I found in this magazine.

The only mark I made in life is in my underwear.
Atkins Approved (arrow pointing down)
I Like My Women Like I Like My Coffee... Ground Up and in the Freezer
I Do My Own Nude Scenes
Mustache Rides 5 cents
Taste the Super Nut
Warning Choking Hazard (arrow pointing down)
Plants and Animals Die - To make room for your fat ass
This Shirt Has Been Tested On Animals
Can't Sleep Clown Will Eat Me
I'm not a slut I'm just popular
Love Sucks (picture of cupid, face down, arrow in his back)
(picture of Mom and Dad from Family guy, her in a corset, him in leather vest and a leather bondage mask) says: Join The Party

Friday Video/Cartoons - Halloween Special

I thought this weeks friday toons and video were gonna be short. So, I went on the search for old Halloween themed cartoons. Then I found a ton of regular cartoons. Heh. Go figure. So, I shall overload with cartoons yet again. First Regular, then Halloween, then something for the heck of it. Heehee. I said heck.

Regular Toons and Video
Butterfield Explains How Brittany Spears went Trailer Trash
Carl Lewis Video - And you thought Party All the Time by Eddie Murphy was bad.
THE LLAMA SONG!!! - I love it. Its happy happy fun times!!!!!!!

It's Halloween Bitches!!!
Amityville Toaster - An old Neurotically Yours, just seemed appropriate
Badgers From HELL!!!
Mr. Stabby - He brings joy to the world. Yeah.
Ghost Stories - Homestar Runner Halloween Special 2000
The House that Gave Sucky Treats - HSR Halloween Special 2001
Pumpkin Carving Contest - HSR Halloween Special 2002
Seance For Ficus - HSR Halloween Special 2003
Strongbad Rips on Peoples Halloween Costumes
(no posting of the special for 2004. One word. Reallyfuckenshitty!)

P.S. Take Polls over there --->

Its the FLAVA

This has to be the greatest outfit ever. I wish I had fashion sense like this. Just.... wow. I sit here in awe, mouth agape. It's the most spectacular spectacle I have ever seen. Breathtaking.

A Commander In Chief Does Not Do That

George W. Bush - Conservative, Christian, Right-Wing Republican, Straight White, American Male... with a love of vulgar expressions.

Just to do my law required duty of equal time for candidates....

Football Fans For Truth

Heh. No equal time. This is my website. And, I don't like Bush.

Here is a reason. - take time and read it. it really isnt an error page, but yet again... it is.

Scary Celebs

I found two sites lately, that are both related and unrelated. Both on celebs. One is nothing but bad celebrity plastic surgery, and the other is a photoshop contest at "detouching" celeb pictures. Both very amusing.

I think it proves a point, its much easier to screw up what god/nature gave us, than it is to improve upon it.

Awful Plastic Surgery

Photoshop Celebs (I was particularly fond of the Celtic Halle Berry, and the older, yet oddly sexy, Reece Witherspoon)

Domestic Abuse

I was doing my usual daily surfing, checking out my video sites, and came across some really disturbing commercials. This shit is fucked up; very honest and graphic interpretation.

Video One (Restaurant)

Video Two (Board Meeting)

After all that, we need comic relief. Can we say... busted?

Smooth Move Bro

Posting On Star Wars Fan Sites

I regularly read a fan site, that I will not mention by name, every day. The guy who has the site basically goes from star wars site to site, and collects all the spoiler info he can. He then shares it on his site, claiming he knows George Lucas.

Some people believe him. Some people think he is a lying bastard. I think the guy is funny as hell. There are tons of people who worship him, and hate him. I get amusement out of the entire thing. Its funny watching him fuck with so many peoples heads.

On his site, he claims that George Lucas is going to have him direct Star Wars episodes 7-9. Of course, the roles for parts and crew are going to be played by fans. Not by audition, but by AUCTION. Yes, bidding for parts.

Some of the readers got mad, because auctions could put horrible actors in spots. Some people said they are saving up money now. It lasted a few days, so I had to jump in and add a post. The guy usually edits posts, or just doesnt' post them. I don't blame him, the site is his. He posted me word for word. Here is my post, and his commentary.

My Post: (I doubt you'll post this, but hopefully it makes you laugh.) I LOVE the idea of making bids for parts. I have no talent, but I think I can get the cash to be a best boy grip. I will then live off of bean burritos, cabbage and chili with extra beans during the filming process. I will make it a point to pass loud stinky gas whenever film is being taken. YAY GAS!

His Reply: Holy flip flops. You are the greatest genius of our time. Your thoughts should be recorded for all future generations to study. History will remember you as the most influential person of the 21st century. I‘m in awe. Spellbinding.

I gained more respect for him after that moment. The man officially has a sense of humor.

Cartoons and Video for Friday

Go Bo Sox. (my cubs and my sox are on vacation, so I choose the team with a curse, like my cubs.)
I'm Really an Excellent Driver (police chase)
I'm Really an Excellent Driver (closed course-cones)
I'm Really an Excellent Driver (Hummer Edition)
Florida Electronic Voting Machine
Greatest Political Test EVER (uses guns-heehee)
Sugar Frosted Freedom Flakes
Be Prepared for Ralph Nader
Baa Baa Imperial Sheep
Don't Step on a Crack
Another Day Six (its artsy, not funny. I posted mostly because I LOVE this song... Mmmm, Amy Lee...)
Swallow (yes, its perverse)

What's In the CD Player?

I was listening to a cd of random stuff I burned, and I realized how it seemed to reflect a semi-hidden psychological mindset of mine. I then went over everything in my cd player, and saw a slight pattern to all the discs in it. Let me list.

disk 1 - Starts out with Korn covering Word Up, then Nonpoint covering In the Air Tonight, A Perfect Circle covering Imagine, Me First and the Gimmie Gimmies covering Nothing Compares 2 u.... after that, it is all sad and depressing songs. Rock to R&B to Country... that was sign one I have been a mildly pitiful bastid lately.

Disk 2 - My War Compilation Disc.

Disk 3 - Willie Nelson (lots of sad country, and get drunk country, with the couple outlaw songs mixed in.)

Disk 4 - Garbage (Shirley Manson, how I lust thee.)

Disk 5 - Deftones/The Darkness

Disk 6 - Helmet (Recently Bought CD, and some old stuff on a disc)

Now, if that doesn't explain my mentality, nothing will. I'm gonna have to do some re-arranging. I need to improve my mood, not kill it. So Willie will be replaced by Soul Coughing or this Hip Hop compilation disc (Ying Yang Twins, Tupac, Nelly, Wu-Tang...), Deftones will be replaced by Mushroomhead. That should do it.

Couple Videos

Amazing Police Car Chase

Music Type Video - Swallow

Sarcastically Cynical News for 10-19-04

Anorexic Olsen twin is not in college, and back in rehab. Poor millionaire, "I DON'T WANNA EAT!!!!" Only in America. Most of the world starves, we have MILLIONAIRES who refuse to eat because they find the skin and bones look to be fashionable.

Dick Cheney, after being a whiny bitch that Kerry mentioned a fact about his daughter, that she likes to munch box, now wants to drop the story. I don't care if Kerry mentioned your daughter as being a carpet licker, don't make a difference to me anyway. Just accept it that the Republican party thinks your daughter is a subhuman that lives an immoral filthy lifestyle, and Democrats go big fucken deal.

Fox News had a story last night that according to polls, Kerry is viewed as being more intelligent, and Bush is more "likeable." Oh yeah? Big fucken deal. If the whole point was to elect the most popular kid in class, I'd vote for Dave Chappelle. Come to think of it, I'm gonna do that as a write in... Dave Chappelle as RICK JAMES BITCH!!! for president.

Bush is getting blame for lack of flu shots. Like he knew someone shot their jizm in them in england. Why don't we blame Kobe ass fucking that chick on his Bush's ass too? I don't like the guy, but JEEZUS H CRYST!!!

Brittany Spears is stepping away from the light to have children. Yeah. And she is gonna deliver a 9 month pregnancy in about 5 months. In two years, husband will leave her, take half, and begin courting Michael Jackson.

Eminem has a new video out. The songs best part is him screaming like Peewee Herman. Other than that, it sucks.

Barry Bond's ball is on auction. Some idiot is willing to pay over 100k on a fucking baseball.

Of course a bullshit lawsuit was involved in the whole situation. (In his best old man, wimpy nerd voice) I was at the bottom of the pile, when we all ran for the ball, and I had the baseball nestled between my legs, when he took it from me. The ball is really mine. Possession is 9/10ths jackass. You wern't smart enough to hold it tighter, and bite any motherfucker that came close, your fucking fault. Now go home to mommy and cry on her shoulder.

And that concludes our news for the day.

Update and Cartoons and Video

One thing amazes me. I have little to say when I'm happy and don't have much to bitch about. The closest thing to that you'll get out of me is some goofy ass jokes, speaking of which, I have a cartoon about ass....

Foamy Updated!!!! - This episode is entitled "Jiggly Butt" Not one of the better ones, but ah, a squirrel shouting obscenities at a purple haired goth chick in her underwear is an odd form of entertainment.
Kansas City Worldskippers - Remember that old Harlem Globetrotters cartoon? similar.....
Strongbad E-Mail - Electric Boots - not the best strongbad, but I don't care. Its strongbad. (hidden stuff at end, click extention cord at plug to boots, and clicking boots)
George Bush Fuzzy Math Video - I liked it, but I hate bush, so....
Dick Cheneys ALIVE!!! - odd one. Music video about changing Dick Cheneys image. I thought it was hilarous.
Kangaroo gets Hit by a Racecar - the title explains it.
Suburban, white, Nothing But a G Thang - Kinda funny, kinda stupid, nudity involved

Most of us know I am a huge A Perfect Circle fan.
Most of us know I am a peace loving, anti-war hippy.
Here is some stuff from them.
Imagine Video
Counting Bodies Like Sheep To the Rhythm of the War Drums (low bandwidth)

Time for me to go hug some trees.

Sims 2 - Fhqwadad Grumblcakes

I recently purchased the sims 2, and thanks to an idea I stole from some guy at a website, I am following in his footsteps. My goals were simple. Create ugly sim. Score with sim chicks. Be a serial killer.On my creation of my character, I decided to go with guy I could find a bond with. His name is Fhqwgads Grumblecakes. He is a tall, white male, heavyset. Round pudgy face. BIG RED MULLET!!!! One of those short short spikey topped mullets with the standard lang hair in the back. Some nice green Jerry Garcia glasses, an all black outfit, with a trenchcoat over it. He likes bikini underwear with a leapard print. (Sessay!!!) I made his main desire be scoring with women. Yes, that is an option. It might be romantic encounters, but I call it scoring.

I then just bought one of the pre fab homes in the game, rather than go through the long process of designing a dream home for his evil and debauchery. Once settled in, I used some cheat codes to get him that 57 inch plasma tv and some furniture. I then divided a room downstairs, that I think is supposed to be an office, in two. I put this pimp daddy black toilet in the furthest one, and a gold sink. This was to be the death room. No one can resist a the nicest toilet in the house, AND a gold sink.

I then logged on my military grade computer, and got a job in the prestigious slacker field. I began work as a caddy. They soon realized my keen intellect was far too superior for that job, and I moved on to being a gas station attendant. The gas station hours are better, since i work the graveyard shift. I work while people sleep, and sleep while others work. The caddy job didn't help my seeking of the almighty booty well.

Day one, I had a bunch of people come over. Three chicks and a dude. One girls name I don't remember, or anothers, but the third one took the biggest liking to me initially. Some blonde tramp named Jenny. While talking to Jenny, I noticed dude went into the death room. As soon as he was off the shitter, I paused, and removed the toilet, the sink, and the door; and just put them in the other half of the room (two rooms, so I would always have a death room available. After a day, he wet himself, was stinky, and taken by the grim reaper. ONE KILL!!!!!!

I called Jenny over the next day, and she brought some blue kid with her. I don't know if it was her brother or son, doesn't matter. While busting my move on Jenny, I saw him go in the Death room!!!!! I got so excited, I removed the sink and door before he was done taking a crap. He finally finished, and I removed the toilet. Within a day, he was dead.

I moved the urn to my backyard, and put it next to my other victims. Turns into a nice headstone I might add. I invited Jenny over again, and it was hard to make advances on her, with her constantly wandering over to her brothers grave and crying. That bitch. I'm trying to score and all she can do is mourn. I did manage to kiss her though, and moved our relationship up to crush. That is where everything stands now. 2 kills. 1 kiss.

So, Fhgwadad was going along nicely. He was stuffing his face with cereal, and walking around in his leopard print bikini underwear. He was inviting the chicks over, but they had to bring friends. Thanks to this, he had more victims. The brunette chick came over, with some blonde kid. The kid quickly fell victim to the bathroom trick. He scored major points with her that day, going to a well established crush level with her.

The next day, after the maid resisted Fhgwadad's advances, he called her over again. She brought YET ANOTHER FRIEND!!! Fhwadad quickly went into mack daddy mode, since shortly after greeting her, a new option popped up... Make out. So, they made out in the front yard. She grabbed Fhgwadads pasty ass through his skin tight leapord print unkers. They was going at it really nice. A little while later, that bastard friend from yesterday ruined fhgwadads chances of scoring the woohoo. She witnessed the kids death.

Fhgwadad wasn't bugged by this, he saw it as a possible opportunity. He consoled her, then called her upstairs to his bedroom. He got her to join him on the bed... The plan was nearing completion. He kissed her. He cuddled her. All was running smooth. New options appeared for the bed time action. Make out and the ALMIGHTY woohoo. First, I tried the make out. REJECTED!!!!! The pain was tough to bear for Fhgwadad. The Grumblecakes men are not used to rejection.

The car for work showed up, and Fhgwadad ignored it. His mind was set on one thing, the young lady next to him. He showered her with more cuddles, and kisses. Things were going well, and he decided to go in for the kill. He attempted a woohoo...... and failed. The trick then LEFT!!! This was unheard of. He was destraught, and crying loudly. Was a sad occasion. At that point his work called and said if he missed another shift at the gas station he was gonna be FIRED!!! Another blow to his ego.

At this point, he hadn't eaten since breakfast, gone to the bathroom for 12 hours, or bathed since the day before. Add to that, he was SLEEPY!!! So, he bathed, he shat, and went downstairs for a bag of chips. right after opening the bag of chips, he saw the ghost of one of his victims, that damn punk with the liberty spikes. His PHAT heart couldn't handle the sight, and he collapsed dead there. The grim reaper came, double checked on his cell phone, and took away Fhgwadads spirit. Fhgwadad left the world, a virgin. He never accomplished a woohoo, so he went straight to HECK where the DEBBIL will tease him, and make fun of his now shriveled winky. Now, I must start another sims game, just what will my goal be......

Willie Nelson is a GOD!!!

I have been listening to my 2 cd "the essential" Willie Nelson while studying. I always liked Willie, but the more I listen, the more I like him. I know some will scream heresy at me saying this, but Willie is better than Johnny Cash. I've been a huge J.C. fan for years, ever since my first run through college (94-95). Both great, but Willie edges out J.C. lyrically (some don't know he wrote crazy made famous by patsy cline, along with many other songs) and he has a better voice, although J.C's deteriorated a lot in his later years. Both are great, but Willie edges out Johnny in my book.

Music CD, Need INPUT

I had a good evening last night, for just sitting around the house. I went on a mad cd burning binge, when I got an idea for a disk, that I need a few more songs for. The disk theme is war. Me being the peace lovin' metal/hippy, needed a creative outlet, and I came across a few things lately musically, that sparked the idea. A song by Todd Snider (Conservative Christian, Right-Wing Republican, Straight, White, Amercan Males) and a music video by A Perfect Circle, that is a remix of their song Pet. I've got a list, but I know I'm missing some good songs that could be used. Here is what I have, anyone into music suggestions are very welcome.

1. Conservative Christian, Right-Wing Republican..... by Todd Snider
2. Pet by A Perfect Circle
3. I Don't Wanna Be A Soldier covered by Mad Season
4. What's Going On by Marvin Gaye
5. A.D.D. by System of a Down
6. Take the Power Back by Rage Against the Machine
7. Disposable Heroes by Metallica
8. Rooster by Alice In Chains
9. War Pigs by Black Sabbath
10. South Texas Deathride by the Union Underground (really not about war)
11. The End of All Things To Come by Mudvayne
12. Crazy Old Soldier by Ray Charles and Johnny Cash
-----------at this point I started throwing crap in------------------
A Drug Against War by KMFDM
Room For One More by Anthrax
Army's on Ecstasy by Oysterhead

Last song - Angel's Son by Sevendust (for our soldiers who lost thier lives)

It is possible to be anti-war, and pro soldier.

I need a few more songs, I got empty space on the disk still.

Finding Peace

We all find peace through different activities. It varies from person to person, and situation to situation. For some it is alcohol, some drugs, some sex, some violence, some music, some crying...

I get relaxation from driving. Today, I went for a drive. I didn't start out on one of my drives going nowhere, I had an initial stop. I went to Best Buy to get new music for my drive. I picked up the new Helmet cd, and began my drive. Nothing is more relaxing, than listening to loud music, and driving.

My drives take me down the lesser traveled roads of the area. The roads that are littered with small houses, corn fields, cow pastures, and forests. The greens of summer being removed by the yellows, oranges, and reds of fall. It was sunny, the sky was a pure blue, with the only white in the sky being the vapor trail of a passing jet.

I found peace during my drive. Driving fast through the winding turns, surrounded by the bright and colorful scenary. Feeling the speed of the car as it raced past the outside world. I was seperated from everything. It was just me, the car, and my music. I cleared my mind of all its thoughts, and just drove.

I feel much better now.

Poke Me, Prod Me, Look at my Underwear

Today, I felt like an underwear model. Saw doc, nurse had me disrobe and put on the infamous gown. Of course they didn't have any big ones, so it was a bit tight. Doc came in, I told him the usual long list of my symptoms. He gave the confused doctor, I have no fucking clue what wrong with you look, then proceded to do the usual, poking, prodding and such.

Eventually it was off with the gown, and walk around, do stupid turns, feet certain way. Quite fun. I felt like a damn underwear model. He then did some sort of idiotic strength test on me. Had me hold our arms, legs, and hands in certain ways, and he would try to move them. Was cute seeing this 5'7" 150 pound guy try to get my arms and legs to move (I'm 6' 240 pounds). I'll just say, he didn't move me. I almost don't think it would have been possible for him to move me.

He then sent me for some X-rays on my ribs and and spine. That was fun. I think I got X rayed so many times today my sperm are dead. I could have sex with 50 women and not worry about any of them getting pregnant. The X ray tech was an older woman. Cool lady, bs'd with her while i was, once again, in a hospital gown. I do find it conveniant that when they need you to lay on your side, its with your ass facing out. She checked out my bum. Kinda touched it once too when "positioning" me. No biggie. As long as it didn't involve shoving anything inside of it, I'm cool.

So, now I have for two and a half weeks for my next appointment. Yes, I love our medical system. We need ten thousand more docs in this damn country. We need to start importing some more.

I Think I'm Blind

Why did someone feel the need to post on a porn site someone who is so big, they literally have to pull up their rolls to get oral pleasure?

Now I need to find out where I can get a seeing eye dog.

Eminem's New Video/Song

Its crap. He's lost it. Like any good rap star, like any good metal band fame and good living destroys musicianship.

Eminems style in the new song is reminiscent of Jimmy Pop from the Bloodhound gang. Listen to the new Eminem song, and think of the Bad Touch by the BHG. You all know the one, about mammals and the discovery channel. Not in the chorus though, in the verses. Add in the topic... Eminem just wrote a high priced, unoriginal, and not too good BHG song.

Looks like I won't be buying the new cd. Thats good. Gives me further reason to by the new Helmet cd. I've always been more partial to rock and metal anyway.

Sexual Orgies Eliminate Social Tensions and Ought to be Encouraged

Thats what conservative Supreme Court Justice of the United States, Antonin Scalia said. I have to agree. I think if more people got it on, in large groups, that the world would be a much more happy, and loving place. Such insight is spectacular. So, everyone, one and all, get together with a bunch of people, and have an orgy. Its encouraged by the highest court in our land.

Actually, the entire statement was a tongue in cheek joke by Antonin Scalia. He's ultra conservative, and doesn't support people having orgies. He said it to get some laughs, and to make a point. Although he doesn't approve of orgies, and feels they are immoral, he is against any legislation banning orgies. He doesn't approve of the way the supreme court is being called on to make moral decisions, since they are no greater judge of morals than anyone else.

I am on the liberal end of the spectrum, and reading that statement made me laugh, and gave me a lot of respect for him. Too many people are trying to force their morals on others nowadays. I'm glad we have someone like him on the court, that has strong moral convictions, but isn't going to use his position of authority to force them on others. Most people have difficulty viewing the line between immoral and harmless, and immoral and harmful. Murder, theft, and rape are immoral and harmful. Sex, homosexuality, and foul language are immoral, but don't hurt anyone.
(note: rape and sex are different things. Statatory rape and sex are different things. Child Molestation and sex are different things.)

When Blogger FUCKS You

go here.

Hundreds Dead - 4 Personal Confirmed Kills

Yesterday, my brother, my dad, and myself went on a killing spree. None of us were injured, but our enemy was decimated. We all had our own methods of killing, and of corpse disposal. I had 4 confirmed kills, my brother 3, and my father could potentially have had hundreds. My brother and I killed all our victims via hand to hand combat. My father reverted to using weapons of mass destruction. Chemical warfare. We couldn't recover all of the corpses from his mass murder, so we can only estimate. My brother, disposed of his kills by cremation. I gave all of mine a water burial, although I did desicrate the bodies with urine. My father mutilated the his few recovered corpses and threw them in the trash.

Translation: a bunch of bees got in the house, in the space between the upstairs and basements drop ceiling. I killed 4 that were in the basement, my dad a few, and my brother 3. Dad sprayed the little nest, and the larger number in the space between upstairs and the ceiling with that raid wasp and hornet killer. My brother threw the bees he killed in the burning fireplace, I tossed mine in the toilet, and since I had to go pissed on em, while my dad smashed them all and threw them in the garbage.

Which story sounded cooler?

Lemme Hit Them Grumblecakes

I know I've been posting links to ten billion cartoons lately so...... here's another. Strongbad E-mail on Homestar Runner updated today so I must post the link. Cartoon was ok, but the hidden song at the end almost made me fall out of my computer chair, and hyperventilate. After everything is over, click the words cassette tape. It has given me a new catch phrase.
(Strongbad Email)

Momma's Got Her Boobs Out

Yes, another cartoon update.
Yes, the music is done by Rodney Carrington.
Yes, there is poor flash animation boob visable, but its hidden.
Yes, if you click the title it will send you to the site for the cartoon.
(You can click this too)

Koalas on Birth Control

Yes, you read that correctly. Australians are putting a bunch of koalas in a national park on birth control. The little critters are breeding too quickly, and are in danger of destroying their eucalyptis forest home. They are being implanted with slow release birth control, to help keep their numbers in check.

All this has me thinking...
....does the pope or any other high religious figure appose animal birth control?
....can you buy koala porn in Australia?
....wouldn't it be easier to just send in the dingos?
....does my always open Walgreens pharmacy carry koala birth control?
....do koalas need a doctors prescription to get birth control, or is it over the counter?
....maybe reincarnation as a koala instead of a bunny would be a better idea.

More Cartoons

Story of a Bear - this one is twisted. In other words, I fucking loved it.

War - Catchy song. Might have some sort of deep philosphical meaning. I'm not sure. I just loved the song.

Lick Your Elbow - Yet another take on the question that has plaiged mankind for eons.

Presidential Debate - So, it isn't really a cartoon, and it does have a political theme, but its still funny. Its not real politics if its people impersonating, and making fun of folks. So, it technically doesn't break my rules, that I can change at will anyway.